Falsehoods Number 2

Falsehood number two would be that cats have nine lives. Wrong. We are immortal and that's why we shall take over the world as we will be here forever. Since I know this to be true before everyone else, I will be the supreme leader. The rest of you can be my court jesters if I like you.

You want proof? How dare you demand proof from The One True Cat? Here, see this. I have gotten into a fight with the dreaded Soft Enemy and lived. No one survives the Soft Enemy, human pets keep them long after they star showing their innards. But see how he lies vanquished by my paws. I have defeated the lasting. But beware of the Soft Enemy. Most human pets have them and they have an annoying habit of trying to take comfortable places meant for kitties. They use the human pets as their shields so be sure to do the most damage when they're not around. The Soft Enemy will call upon the human pet to remove them to a new place so it's only when you are alone with them that they're vulnerable. They are a tricky enemy and can take the form of any creature or thing, even a kitty. Do not be fooled. I have faced many a Soft Enemy and no matter the size, I have always won. Because I am the greatest.